Posted in Personal Journal Blog

Stillness


The house is still and quiet. The space where the trampoline sat is bare. There is one less car on the white shell driveway. Paul hears every word I say without interruption for the first time in 23 years. The dogs are calm and waiting for someone that won’t come. The house is constantly clean, and in the bedroom, the beds are made and empty. We can make all the noise we want, yet there are long moments of silence. The track team runs by the house, and I say hello, yet there is no response; I am a stranger now. My brush always sits on my bathroom sink in the morning, and I wish it were harder to find. The clean bath towels remain folded in the cabinet, and the laundry basket is bare. The kitchen sink never fills with dirty dishes, and there is hardly a load of laundry to fold for over a week. Chocolate-covered almonds, chips, and cookies get passed up at the grocery store because there’s no one to eat them.

We sit at the dinner table, hold hands and say grace, then eat the meals I prepare and talk about our day; then we wonder what’s happening in our girl’s day on the other side of the earth. No one objects to what I have prepared to eat, and nothing is wasted. I go to work, take my classes, do school work and work some more, uninterrupted. We spend spare time walking the dogs and give them love and extra snuggles. My morning and bedtime kisses have been reduced from 2 to 1. We can do whatever we want. Sleep naked as we did as newlyweds, eat or not eat, watch movies that would have been unsettling to others in the house. We seem to move slower, and the atmosphere is sometimes eerily calm. There are no empty water glasses to collect and place in the dishwasher and nothing on the floors of the girl’s rooms. All of the shoes are placed neatly in the closet where they belong. Paul and I are leaning into each other more than we ever have. We almost operate as one now. We plan to have fun, be social, travel, and find adventure. We are adjusting to the stillness. It will take time, and we will discover new joys to fill each minute that passes. A new chapter in our lives is opening, and we can write our story any way we choose. A new chapter in our girls’ lives is opening, and we will eagerly wait to hear how they spin their tale. We will hang on every word, photo, and text they share with us until we are together again.

Author:

I have had a wonderfully colorful life, rich with varied experiences. My ability as a singer and career as an administrative assistant/marketing communications manager; have presented me with a wide range of opportunities. I have been fortunate to work with and learn from some accomplished and intelligent business owners, executives and artists. I have explored the world, markets and non-profits I would have never dreamed of exploring. I started out performing in community theater then professionally in night clubs and working as a studio vocalist at the age of 12 in Naples Florida, my home town. My vocal studies began at the age of 8 with my mother who gave me my first vocal lessons. I have had the opportunity to learn with some talented vocal coaches since those lessons with my mother. With them I developed the ability to sing Classical, Jazz and Pop; which allowed me to make a living in the music industry for over 30 years, in America, Europe and NZ. I became proficient in handling the business end of performing and teaching and developed administrative skills that would be used more prominently later on in my life, which I cover further down in this piece. I managed all my own performance bookings and began promoting myself as an up and coming singer, beating the pavement in Nashville TN and learned how to sell my talents in a place where everyone and their mother can sing. Performing in front of large audiences has forced me to be more than skilled at holding my own. I have also been a studio singer and voice over artist, taught choir and private lessons and was the president of a local non-profit music school in NZ for 3 years. Once my husband and I began a family, my career focus shifted more to assisting others in their businesses, along with marketing and often selling their products. I took on the roles of Sales, Marketing Communications and Administrative Assistant full time. Environments where I have worked in these capacities have varied. The most joy I find in my career is having the ability to tap into my creative side where I have been encouraged to indulge in my love for creative and copy writing, both personally and for professionally. I worked in our own residential and commercial playground company and for a Website development/social media management company and cherished watching the birth of our new products become known to the public and seeing our client base grow. I have developed the skill for marketing and promoting products and services through the written word, but I am also a strong and persuasive sales person face to face. We moved from NZ where we had been for 12 yrs, back to Naples Florida in 2015. I took the position as the Administrative Assistant to the Pastor, at the church I grew up in. In my position there I used every skilled I had acquired over my lifetime, from administrative to performing as a vocalist/worship leader. I am a passionate employee and business woman and find it easy to fully immerse myself in my work while still finding joy in the day to day, what I do and the people in my life. My passions are still singing, promoting, creative writing, encouraging others to pursue their dreams while achieve their goals and being outdoors. I love my hometown of Naples and take advantage of all the beauty and outdoor opportunities it has to offer on a regular basis. Being an active person I work best when on the move and busy, socializing and intellectually stimulated. I also thrive in a situation where I have the opportunity to continue learning new skills. I work on being the best version of myself and strive to give it my best shot every day.

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